I was having a really stressful day this week. I mean, I felt like my adrenals were really going to go up in smoke, or something. I had had a ton of iced tea (my fave caffeinated drink of choice), and I knew I just should have probably: Gone for a yoga class, taken a trip to the gym, walked around the park in my neighborhood, splurged on a massage...But something in me just wanted to continue doing what I was doing. I was working on a new project, even though it was way past my bedtime, and I was getting pretty wiped out...
Now, yes, yes, yes: I could have stopped, had a nice, crisp glass of white wine, called a friend, or dallied around and gone online, but... I decided to power through what I was working on. I knew, intuitively, what was what going to make me feel the best: Moving forward and not necessarily getting it all done, but making just enough progress until I could feel that satisfied "click,"and stop.
And I realized, whether this was a good thing or bad, learned or conditioned, my own response to stress at the time, whatever- I just had to really and simply respect the need for that "click" feeling. It gave me a bit of a natural high, and made me THEN want to relax, as if I'd really earned it.
My friend the therapist Mick Kubiak explains that this is my very own version of behavior modification, to which I say-well, good!
If it works for me, I think it...works!
So, listen: Please. Do not force yourself to take a bath, watch another show on your Netflix queue, or even workout in the name of "self-care," if it's going to possibly cause you more anxiety when you are stressed to your limit. I have left more than one "forced" yoga class, glaring at some of the terribly rude drivers in my gym's huge parking lot afterward, my calm dissolving instantly. Of course, I really and certainly do not want to discourage exercising in order to decrease your stress levels, but sometimes, you have to face that mother head on. You have to just deal with it-whatever it may be-kid's homework help, piles of laundry, that report that needs to get done, banking, paying bills-whatever it may be that is grabbing a hold of your brain, and not letting go.... Now, that's some self-carefulness. xo
But, JUST in case you want to treat yourself (after you're done being self-careful, of course): (!)
From our friends at Honest Beauty:
Yes, we have all probably watched the Netflix series, “Tidying Up with Marie Kondo.” And yes, she is magic, and adorable, and very, very motivating. If you are on this site, I can only assume that you not only have also watched it in its entirety, but were inspired enough to Kondo your whole place, in order, as she suggests, starting with dumping every single piece of clothing and all of your shoes and accessories on your floor and the bed. (!) (Yes, I did this a few months back, too, and not for the first time!)…